Thursday, July 15, 2010

finding the current reflection


in the heat and the clutter and the where-did-they-come-from fleas, a new life is being forged. the old life, the inertia, the sorry-i'm-too-exhausted-to-participate-but-thanks-for-asking response is being vacuumed up, put to the curb and traded in for better.

what lies behind and under the leftovers of former dreams and unfulfilled efforts? what, more precisely who, am i without the totes of vintage hats, grateful dead bootlegs, art supplies, years of smithsonian magazines, and reams of torn-out, unused recipes stuffed in a drawer? who am i if i step aside from the unconscious clutter and attachment to mementos of all my former selves? who am i in the midst of a pared down, second-hand free, keep only things that reflect my current state of being environment? i plan to find out.

with high hopes and enthusiasm, i am lightening my load. ruthlessness is now the path to my true inner nourishment, my understanding of what-in-the-hell has meaning to me at this stage of my life.

the garbage men will hate me in the morning, the car salesman will be my new best friend tomorrow night, the salvation army will love me next week. i have felt somewhat lost. i am purging to be found.

6 comments:

  1. I hope you get there, Graciel. I feel somewhat lost in all the clutter around me too. Thinking of you. Hope all is well with you. Hugs from Daisy.

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  2. I know that feeling, all those feelings. There are days when I want to take everything outside and only bring back the bare essentials.
    And ugh, fleas. Me too. Times six. We haven't had them in years, they probably came with the new kittens.

    You are on the right path. I can hear you singing.

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  3. Fleas,leeches,little grass hopping hitchhikers,they cop a free ride into your life. Consider it a message that it's time for you to cop a free ride into your new life, lighten the load, and bounce happily into the next great adventure or drive that new car! Hats,recipes,magazines and The Grateful Dead won't miss you, Alice out grew the rabbit hole!!!

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  4. Purging...I love purging! It's an exhilerating willingness, an opening to new possibilities. I've spent the last year purging and I'm still at it.
    Yes, yes, Graciel, go for it!

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  5. Yes, I, too have felt this, for the past two weeks! I know you know that it best to listen to your intuition and the Universe.
    We've outgrown old ways of being, walk into the new!

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  6. Dear heart. Time to wave an adios and later you will not even remember you ever owned all that stuff. Mary used to make me laugh with her Smithsonian Magazine story - after years of subscriptions, she cancelled it, which meant a phone call from someone at the publisher's, wanting to know if she would tell them why. Yes, she replied, I don't read them yet I can't throw them away. Whereupon she threw them away.

    xoxo
    Debi

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I always appreciate the time you take to comment on my blog. Thank you for stopping by. Peace from my heart to yours. xo, Graciel