Intellectually speaking, I know emotions are the key to a passion-filled life. I know emotions are the key to creativity. I know emotions are the key to opening the heart. Unfortunately, my emotions are currently stifled. Held at bay. Dry as dust. What this means is my desire to create art is blocked, my culinary interest is weak and my heart is gated. If I don't do something to jump-start the flow, my emotional dam will burst on its own in an uncalled-for moment. I can see it happening in the Mega-Mart while shopping for toilet bowl cleaner. "We need a cleanup in aisle 14B. Bring the mop. It's a river."
Emotions are what usher in beauty and usher in love. The most eloquent music vibrates with emotion, the most breathtaking art is a still-frame of emotion, the most passionate kiss is emotion unleashed. The emotional has nothing to do with the intellectual, which makes it uncomfortable for me. However, if I claim to want more love in my life, if I claim to want more passion in my life, it's high time I get over my discomfort. It's high time I do whatever it takes to let the dam burst and get over myself.
What I am in need of is emotional healing and, Sweet Mother of God, it can't be done alone. Not fully and not to the depths needed to usher in the love. It takes a witness. And it takes the courage to ask for the witness. It requires vulnerability and willingness. On everyone's part.
Because my soul is craving a deeper understanding of love, a deeper experience of love, my emotional tour of healing begins today. With one witness to start and eight more to follow. Am I nervous? You bet. But I can't live anymore with the fears that block my emotional life. I can't live anymore with my feelings held at bay and my creativity crushed down. I surrender. Release the river and let the fears be washed away. Ungate my heart and let love sail on in.