i am here because i am here.
and in this here, i am being tutored on the now.
the present.
the what-is-right-before-me.
even if many times i don't want to be here, here is what is teaching me to be me.
here is where i understand the power of the moment. in the moment, here, is where discord dissolves. in the moment is where illness vanishes, teeth unclench, the chattering mind is stilled.
in the moment, here, thousands of miles removed, is the only place my heart is reconciled in choosing to love an army man. if i am there, out of the moment, i am not me and the illusion of loneliness is crushing.
so, i am here, behind the garage, resisting the urge to give up. learning, still, the finer points of using the present to stay sane.
in the moment, here behind the garage, activity swirls around my stillness. the goldfinch bounces over sound waves of the blue jay piping its call. the squirrel, surprised, yet brave, inches forward. yellow butterflies, pollen-coated bees, cicadas old and new. the sky, blue as pool water. the breeze, a brush with grace.
i am here because i am here.
to be me.
oh god, thank you. i am not yet in the now today, still stuck in an afternoon earlier this week. you have such perfect timing, and thank you for the words. :)
ReplyDeletexoxo
Debi
Ah yes, the here, the now, the forever in this moment. Just being. Why oh why, do we make this so hard?
ReplyDeleteBeautiful Graciel...and I too will most likely still have words flowing during this August Break.
Thank you. A beautiful reminder of the moment to moment re-orienting out of our minds & into the beauty of
ReplyDeletethe present. Sound, sights; no thought, no interpretation.
A worthy practice.
Well said, Graciel. We are in this moment now so we can become who we will be tomorrow. I hope you have a nice week ahead.
ReplyDeleteYes, this has been my goal for the past few years, some days I get there, other days I can't find my way to the moment no matter what. But I think the fact that we try to get there, that we are aware that that is where we should be, is what counts most.
ReplyDeleteAnd yes, to be you.
beautiful words. very thought provoking.
ReplyDeleteYour blog is lovely and I love your photos. The story about the oriele broke my heart. I'm a fellow August Breaker and am looking so forward to seeing everyone's photos! Have subscribed to your blog.
ReplyDeletexo Erin
beautiful words - inspiring thoughts.
ReplyDeleteAmelia.x