21st century girl

in so many ways, i am behind the times. technology confounds my right brain and often makes me nervous. i was born into simpler times and to this day i am fond of the simple and the straightforward. like hand-held can openers and the rotary telephone. i feel safe in the 20th century.

but it is the 21st, and the singular household phone with 3-way party line and the no-hurry clicking sound of a number dialed with the eraser end of a pencil is long gone. (although it is hardly a problem to scare up the icons from my youth in my father's "relics-r-us" basement museum.) yes, i have a cell phone, the antiquated flip-open kind, and 3 phones at home that plug into the wall. finally, though, the outrageous fees to keep my little-used home phones active have prompted me to take a leap into this 11 year old new century. i ordered an upgraded cell phone.

it arrived yesterday. i felt nervous as a cat.

it took me hours to even open the box. more hours to call for activation and read the start guide with minuscule print. it's a slim rectangular thing, black, with exposed "qwerty" keyboard. (the touch screen model is too big a leap for this rotary-loving girl.) it has a camera and when i read that the tiny silver disc under the lens is a mirror for self portraits, i laughed out loud.

it's a no-contract phone. i bought the modest option for texting, 15 per day, never having sent a text in my life. with mid-life eyesight and an impossibly small keyboard, i stand no chance of joining the teenage ranks of those who walk through life with head facing down, fingers moving faster than a squirrel on crack.

and now, to terminate my land-line service. the thought of it makes me nauseous. my right brain feels unsafe. but i will do it. i will unplug myself from the 20th century and belatedly join the present times. don't expect a text from me anytime soon. or self portraits from shopping mall food courts. i'm still an old fashioned girl who is rarely camera-ready and enjoys looking up at the sky.