Hello 2009

Hello, 2009. I'm happy to see you. I've enjoyed the first blush of getting to know you today. Sunshine, quiet contemplation, raspberries and contented cats. Keep this up, and we're going to get along famously.

I hope we do. Get along famously, that is. I have balanced hopes, as opposed to high hopes, we will make the most of our time together. I've been thinking carefully today about what I would like to glean from our relationship. Let's see, there is peace, more joy, more love, more compassion, creative verve, courage, strength of heart and mind, openness, adventure, more visibility, flight, great health, more prosperity, more laughter, a better car, a better camera, (because let's be practical), did I mention more prosperity(?), mental stability, discernment, freedom from fear, receptivity, boat-loads of fun. Etc.

In thinking carefully, I wanted to come up with a singular word to define my hopes for the coming year. An edict, of sorts, for our budding relationship. A word that encompasses everything I could possibly want for myself. And for you, of course. Since we're in this together.

So, my word, my singular sensation to light the path of our seasons together is BLOOM. Isn't that simple? Isn't that perfect? In everything I face, in every opportunity that crosses my path while we are together, I want for my soul to bloom. To grow more lovely and loving.

One more thing, 2009. I want you to be kind to my friends and family and readers, and oh, heck, everyone who aspires to use the light of their soul for goodness. I want you to give them all strength and courage to meet the challenges they will face. I want you to bless them with faith in themselves. I want you to give them respite. And laughter. And uplifting communion with each other. Most of all, 2009, I want you to open their hearts to more opportunities for love.

{If you, Dear Reader, have a one-word edict for your relationship with 2009, I would love, love to hear what it is...}

That little boy in black fur, who loves my word, is Remmington.

And So It Goes

Good bye 2008. I will not soon forget you, but I admit, I am happy to see you go. You were both bitter and sweet in equal measure. You tested me, but you never bested me. Within your confines, I was encouraged to let go of many things. Yet in the void left by each release, you brought forth new options, new avenues, new souls. It was up to me to take the newness unto myself, you did not force it upon me. And Dear One, I took it. I took it all; your uncharted territory, your tears and your triumphs.

So bless you, 2008. Bless you for each and every moment you gave me. I am stronger, so much stronger, than I was 365 days ago. My instincts are sharper. My trust in myself has inflated. My understanding of what is important is more clear. The sweet moments you gave me are deeply etched in my heart.

So long. Far well. Thank you kindly. Good bye.

The View From Here 3

We Americans

We Americans are too afraid. We've been brainwashed by a tyrannical administration for 8 long years. We've been told time and again, we are not safe. We've been told the world hates us. We've lost freedoms and rational judgement. We've literally and figuratively barricaded our doors. In the process, we've lost our warm and welcoming heart.

We Americans have been sheltered by 2 vast oceans and 2 benign neighbors. We have also been sheltered by arrogance. We have largely felt superior to the rest of the world, never really finding it needful to understand anyone beyond our borders. Most Americans speak only one language, oftentimes incorrectly. Why would the population of the world's leading country need to bother with others? We are the way-showers, the benchmark, the heralded blueprint of democracy. So why bother with others? Because while we have been cowering in our sleep, the world has awoken.

If America wants to retain its leading edge, it must learn to embrace the rest of the world. We must choose to step down from the high horse we have marched forward on before we are thrown from the saddle. We must choose to actively live as if the rest of the world matters. Because it does. For many reasons. The number one reason being peace. Add to the reasons, our collective safety and our economic solvency.

You know how good it feels when some one understands you as an individual? When some one "gets" you? We call that person a friend. We bond. We enjoy and respect each other. And we stand up for each other. We become each other's protector. All because we can be our true selves with that person, and being ourselves is the greatest longing of our hearts. So apply that feeling on a larger scale. Populations of countries bothering to get to know each other, learning from each other and understanding each other. It all leads to respect and watching each other's backs. Which leads to stability and the flow of money around the globe.

We Americans need to stop being so afraid. We need to wake up to a vibrant world. We need to open our hearts and find ways to connect with human beings beyond our isolating borders, human beings who have so many of the same wants and needs as we do. In welcoming the world, we ensure our collective safety and our financial liquidity. In welcoming the world, in warming our hearts, we add more life to life.

{ This post was inspired by the book, The Post-American World, by Fareed Zakaria. An enlightening, easily understandable look at the reasons for the rise fo the rest of the world.}

For another opinion on the plight of America, go here. It makes sense to me!

Let There Be Light

To My Friends

In this season of miracles, offerings, and glad tidings; in this season of hope and of birthing new light, I pause to thank heaven and earth for my friends. It is they, in their myriad differences and great beauty, who sustain me. It is they, givers of healing and encouragement, who keep my soul buoyant. Who keep my soul laughing. Who keep my soul this side of sane.

Without my friends, I could not see myself or understand who I am. They give me clarity and courage and comfort. They offer me reflections of the Divine. They are the doorways to my soul's fulfillment. For me, they are the crown-jewel gifts of this season. And all the seasons that follow.

To my nearby friends and my far away friends and my friends of the heart whom I have never met, thank you for offering the only gift I will ever truly need...the gift of the light from your soul.

{Photo courtesy of my friend and toy collector, Don.}

365 Days of Christmas

It's not that I don't like Christmas. I do. The candle light, the cookies, the carols, the gifts with my name on them; it's all very appealing. The love and the warmth and the gathering. Makes for a wonderful life. But the monetary stress, because I never start shopping in June, and the pressure to express how much people mean to me in a condensed time frame, has left me cranky about Christmas.

The pressure to perform and provide every December drains me. I'd much rather spread the love and the presents out over the whole year. I'd rather gather with people I care for when the mood strikes and schedules allow, than the frenzied, blustery, obligatory last 2 weeks of the year. I've kept up the yearly rigor and angst because there never seemed to be a way out. Everybody blindly agrees to the frenzy and so I have gone along on the wild ride. But 6 years ago, when Jean came into my life, the frenzy began to fade.

6 years ago, I was hospitalized for drastic unpleasantness in my intestinal tract. The hope was to be home in time for the annual Christmas Eve uber-extravaganza. On the 23rd, however, all hopes were dashed. I wouldn't make it home for Christmas. How could I miss the frenzy, the food, the love, the warm-fuzzy family gathering? How could I miss Christmas? It was unthinkable.

After a slew of women came and went in the hospital bed next to mine, Jean arrived on the evening of December 24th. She was 72. Four foot eleven. She wore brown shoes. She had trouble breathing. I introduced myself and told her she was not alone. She mumbled thank you and smiled at me.

Jean was only in my life for 3 hours. She choked and stopped breathing when a young nurse came to check on her. A frenzy of activity erupted in our room, with doctors and nurses trying to revive her and 2 lawyers watching the process. I was sitting in the opposite corner, invisible in the mayhem. A do-not-resuscitate order was revealed, and she died. At 9:52pm on Christmas Eve.

While my family ate German confections around a sumptuously decorated table and sang carols in the glow of a candle-lit tree, I sat until midnight in the company of Jean. She, shrouded in the hospital-regulation wrapper for the deceased, still causing the air-compression bed to rise and fall under her weight, and me, shrouded in a new found peace.

Jean helped me realise how ridiculous is the notion of saving up my expressions of love for one season out of the year. That if I miss the season or the day, if I am not present for presents, I miss the opportunity to love. Jean helped me realise the season of Christmas is precious, but really not more precious than any other season. Because in every season and every day lies an opportunity to express how I feel about my friends and family. To celebrate the birth of goodness. To give comfort. To share joy. To offer peace. To invoke the Christ-spirit in my life, if I choose.

So yes, I like Christmas. 365 days of the year.

The View From Here 2

The View From Here

The Light Of Love

Thank you, little flame, for sending my steadfast prayers and petitions to the invisible realms. Thank you for keeping my spirits focused on truth and possibilities. Thank you for your beacon that knows no time or space, and knows the light of love is a force to be reckoned with.

Thank you, little flame, for reaching his heart across the miles. Thank you for sustaining him in difficult moments. Thank you for the stillness you have brought to me, the stillness that channels the whispers of God. Thank you for keeping the path between his heart and mine well lit. And at 2am on day 54 of our vigil, thank you, little flame, for illuminating my soul and my phone with the sunniest, most welcome, "Hi Honey, it's me" of my life.

Holiday Windows In Mayberry 2

Many Blessings

This morning at work, my friend, Lynn, found a handwritten note addressed to no one and everyone. The 3 1/2"x 4 1/2" slip of paper read:

"Many Blessings,

Please take this as a gift from the Universe. I pray that

it multiplies many times for you and all you love.

This world we live in is a wonderful place. Enjoy it.

With Love."

Shortly after finding the note, Lynn found a folded $20 bill on the floor. When I arrived, Lynn handed me the little note and said it was my turn. When my gift arrived, I was to pass on the note. Within one hour I had passed on the note.

My gift of many blessings was not monetary, nor could a value be placed on it. My gift of many blessings was priceless and powerful. It came from my friend, Sue, the Cookie Contessa who once made me cupcakes to thank me for writing this blog. An hour after I received the little note, Sue thanked me again for writing...by giving me my blog as a book. 2 volumes and one on the way at the close of the year. My blog as a 3 volume book. Printed in its entirety, photos and all, and spiral bound. Me, as a book.

I think Sue said she did this to thank me again for writing and something about how much my writing meant to her and my last post had her in tears, but I'm not sure. I was so stunned by the time and the effort and the heart it took to create this blessing for me, I was in the throws of an instant out-of-body experience. I hope and pray when I burst into tears and hugged her tight I said out loud how much I loved her. I hope I expressed my gratitude. But really, it's not possible, when something has touched me so deeply, to express fully my thanks. The effort of this blessing leaves me speechless.

When I arrived home this afternoon, I spread a blanket on the floor, made rose petal tea, put the cookies I had ordered from Sue on a plate and sat down to leaf through 2 years of words. My words, mostly, with smatterings of favorite poems. I had not realised how many words I have written. Words that could not be held back once I defied my own penchant for living in the shadows. And now the words that have poured from my heart can be held against it. For the first time.

I have wanted to write a book. Sue showed me today, I already have. She gave me the visual of my dream to have and to hold, and to give me the courage to continue. So I shall. With an even more grateful heart.

This world we live in is truly a wonderful place. The little note that was passed to me, with its wishes and prayers for Universal gifts, multiplied countless times for me. I am passing the note onto all of you now with wishes for multiplied gifts. Please print it out or write it down and carry it with you until your Universal gift arrives. When it does, and it will, please pass your note to some one else and ask that they do the same. Let's accept our many blessings and spread the love.

{For anyone in the Buffalo area in need of mouthwatering, sinfully delicious holiday cookies, please feel free to contact Sue, the Cookie Contessa at: suelcookies@hotmail.com. Her raspberry almond thumbprints are my favorite!}

Holiday Windows In Mayberry

The Gift In Adversity

There is so much opportunity when things are not going well or as expected. It is the difficult times that yield the most flavorful harvest. It is adversity that can throw wide the windows that were thought to be painted shut. In adversity, listen for the call. The call of opportunity for growth and reward and the sweet amidst the bitter. Answer the call, and be born again into a more splendid version of your world.

The call came yesterday for me. It was on behalf of my Mother who was lost in a dark pool of tears. I left work early, armed with sunshine-orange gerbera daisies, and showed up at her side. My job in her journey through cancer is to keep her spirits lifted and her mind focused squarely on the positive. I did not ask why she had been crying. I know why. I did not ask her to tell me of her fears. I simply put orange sunshine in every room and suggested we finish decorating her beloved Christmas tree. We put on German carols and hung silver pine cones. We discerned which branches would hold the white candles to best light the tree in a magical glow. I made 2 cups of tea and set up the manger scene. I unwrapped the Santa Claus collection. We talked quietly about going to Germany again.

While hanging her grandmother's glass bell on the tree, my mother said simply, "I feel so much better now that you're here". And there it was. My gift in adversity. The awareness I was making a difference and the sweet connection of hearts in a seemingly bitter time.

I tell you, do not back away from difficult times. Meet them with courage and open hands and a soft heart. We all need each other. And we have all been afraid to ask for the love and the help. Be willing when opportunity calls. Follow your instincts and act. Offer your true self. Your true self. I promise you, your world will be changed by the sweet gifts in adversity.

Pull Back

Oftentimes, when our energy is directed outward on behalf of others or our personal commitments, and sustained at high levels, it becomes necessary to pull back. It becomes necessary to refuel. To revive. To honor. Ourselves. Even for a day. Or bits and pieces of successive days. Oftentimes, if we don't choose to pull back, we will be pulled down.

You who can't say no, I am giving you permission to say no. You who rush from one self-imposed obligation to another, stop. Go to bed early. Wake up late. You who think the world should be spotless, leave the dirty dishes in the sink. Read a book. Drink tea. Let it be. You who must do it all, for pity's sake, ask for help. Asking does not mean you have failed. You who cannot let go of control, resign as general manager of the Universe. You have not received enough hugs. You have not given enough hugs.

We, you and me, need a break. We need cream in our soup. We need cupcakes with sprinkles. We need fleece. We need time to do nothing. And we are the only ones who can give ourselves permission to stop, let go and say no. It is our grown-up responsibility to ourselves to occasionally play hooky. To honor ourselves and not put the madness before sanity. To pull back before we are pulled down. To choose to put ourselves first.

The Audible Sigh

Today is a day for deep, releasing sighs. The kind that make your shoulders finally relax and beg you to spend time horizontal, under blankets, with books. This is a good day. Although, I realize, all days are good. But today, while the new moon sliver meets the shining rays of Jupiter and Venus in the western twilight sky, love is working its quiet magic.

My Mom is healing well from her cancer surgery and building strength for the forthcoming chemical invasion. My newest cat, Buddha, has let me in on his well kept secret. He's a lover boy. He likes nothing more than to have his face rubbed. And give my heart wings, my Love is not missing anymore. He is not home, but as of today, I have definitive word he is alive and well and doing what has been asked of him.

So, my lit candle in the window, the prayers, the mala beads, the instincts, the hopes, the mind-chatter held at bay, the kindness of others, the cupcakes, the letters, the patience, the trust, all have led me to this day. The day when a sigh of relief could shudder up from my lungs and pull me down to the sofa, under blankets, with books. The day when all my efforts are confirmed as being worthwhile. The day that gives me strength to give thanks, keep calm and carry on.

A Home For Buddha

10 Lives Club website photo: shy, buff adult male

Nowhere to hide in the kitchen. Yikes!

Behind the door. Not safe enough.

Waaaaayyyyyyyyy in the back of the skinny, old closet. "I think I'm safe. I think I'm safe."

Dear Buddha,

I love you already. I'm sorry it took me 3 weeks from the time we first met to understand we belong together. I was distracted by thoughts of a socially outgoing and adorable cat to keep my rambunctious Remmington company. I have always had cats claim me in obvious ways. You hid behind a chair at the shelter and I dismissed you.

Luckily for both of us, Angels intervened and had my head and heart snapping whenever I saw a buff-colored cat. And then it was the incessant whispers of "Buddha" in my ear until I finally realised I had been thinking of you for a solid week. Yes, at times, I am slow on the uptake, but I have enough Universal training to eventually understand the signs.

I thank God for these uncertain economic times, Sweet Buddha, because they have shifted my priorities. I am now able to let go of my ridiculously strict list of what and what only will make me happy. It is as if my heart has been held tightly in a bud, and now, out of necessity, the restrictions and freedoms of these purposeful times have allowed my heart to fall open in bloom.

In the falling and the opening, I have turned my mind back to you. Suddenly, you became an option. Suddenly, all that mattered was that I take the risk of offering you a home. It makes no difference anymore if you are painfully shy. You need a home and it is the least I can do, as my contribution to a healthier, more lovable planet, to approach you once more and see if you would have me. And, Angels be blessed, you said yes.

When the 10 Lives Club cat shelter told me you had been with them since July of 2007 and before that, you were in a shelter in Indiana, slated for euthanasia, I realised, tearfully, you had been in shelters for most of your 2 and a half years of life. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. But I'm here now. We found each other. Hide as much as you want. Be whoever you are. You are safe. I will love you no matter what. xo

{The Ten Lives Club shelter for cats is in Concord, NY, just south of Boston. They are a no-kill shelter with 300 cats currently in their care.}

New Pioneers~ the reprise

I originally posted this essay in August of 2006. Amazingly, there are a few friends and readers who have been with me since then and may recall this piece. I was guided to re post this today. As a reminder for myself.

Angels are writing classifieds. They are putting a call out for new pioneers. Pioneers who are willing to instill balance. Pioneers who are willing to make peace. Pioneers who are willing to uncover inner landscapes and share them with the world.

The Angels are calling for me. They are also calling for you. We are the new pioneers. We are the innovators that will save the rain forests, lift up the poor and stop the endless cycle of war. We are the innovators that the Angelic Realm is relying on to shift this world on its axis. To heal this world of its ills. To usher heaven down to earth.

What can we do to shift and heal and usher? What can we do to answer the call and be a new pioneer? We can be ourselves. Utterly. Completely. Daily. We can express who we really are. As God made us. In front of everyone we meet. Quirks, smirks, passions and all.

This call takes courage to answer. Courage of heroic proportions. Because we have been taught to live our lives to please other people. We have been taught to suppress the best parts of ourselves to fit in. To be accepted. To earn love. We have been taught by our parents and our schools and our society at large to squelch the very characteristics that make us each unique. The very characteristics that empower us. It takes rare courage to stop heeding the pressure imposed on us. To stop making the opinions and approval of others, all others, matter so much.

But the salvation of the world depends on each of us to dig deep for that rare courage. To give ourselves permission to go against the tide and express our true selves. To express God through ourselves. And with God, there is only goodness. Only love.

When we are truly ourselves in front of another person, our energy automatically empowers that other person to feel comfortable to express who they really are. Their personal brand of caring, of humor, of love. Like a domino effect, one person's courage triggers the same courage in the next person and the next and the next.

When enough of us heed the Angelic call to be who we are in every moment, to be the new pioneers, miracles will abound. Peace will abound. Love will abound. God's balanced Kingdom and Queendom will abound. When enough of us heed the Angelic call, we will discover we are individually and collectively the long awaited second coming.

Courage, My Love

This is my new understanding. It is very easy to feel discouraged. It is very easy to take the low road. It is very easy to give up. Add to the new understanding that it takes courage to stay positive. Courage to keep a peaceful mind. Courage to attend to the needs of the moment while loss and despair stand ready to seep their poisonous fumes through cracks in the heart. Do not feel discouraged. Do not give up. Make a pact with me. Let's choose to be courageous.

In this pact of ours, full of new understandings, let's also choose to be more open and honest. Let's ask for help when we need it. Let's ask friends and strangers to send up prayers on our behalf and the behalf of those we love. It works, you know. That prayer thing. It makes a world of difference. I have seen it. Felt it. Lived it firsthand. Let's also remember to give no matter what our circumstances. Giving~ things, compliments, time, hugs, our best~ steers us immediately off the low road and soars our spirits skyward.

Let's stop recounting the reasons to be unhappy, the reasons to be upset. Let's instead use the power of the mind and heart to focus on what we have to be thankful for. What is actually going right. Have courage, my Love. There are always things going right.

Make a pact with me. To see the glass half full. To dare to imagine it completely full. To hold onto hope in the most trying of circumstances. To balance crying with laughter. To dare to think positive when the world is thinking negative. To be courageous. To give. And to love. No matter what.

Barakah

In the midst of present uncertainty, the Universe has asked me to practice what I have been diligently taught. Now is the time to hone your skills, dear student, they whisper. Now is the time to flex your wings. Now is the time to know for sure you have the power to attract miracles. Set your mind and heart to the task, just as we have shown you. Abandon doubt. Clear your mind. Open your heart. Fly.

And so I have prayed. I have asked, on a daily basis, for the spirit of love and good health and prosperity and freedom to be with me and those I love. I have stood on a mountaintop, in my mind's eye, shining like a beacon, arms spread wide, repeating over and over, "find me. come home to me". I have stepped out of the shadows to enlist the aid of any and all in the healing of my Mother. I am holding a mindset of positive outcome, to the very limits of my ability. I am calling on Angels. I am staying in the present moment. I am caring for myself. I am playing with my cat.

As well, I am asking for signs and confirmations and a well-lit path. And I am receiving all of it. From the solitary, majestic buck at the side of the road, to the reluctant journal I won on Tara's blog, to the embraces so generously given, to the walls that have crumbled to dust, to today, the day of my sweet and unexpected Barakah from Maryam in Morocco. Barakah: my luck, my abundance, my fulfillment, my blessing. The incense I will yield to heaven in gratitude for the utter richness of my life.

Abandon doubt. Clear my mind. Open my heart. Fly.

{10,000 thank yous to Jen Lee, Tara Bradford and especially dear, dear Maryam.}

p.s....just in case you are not aware of the magic of linking, click on the bold, blue words and be transported.

Missing

Some one I love is missing. The official term is missing in action. He is in the army, you see. And he is lost. To me and to everyone who cares deeply for him. Not so very long ago, he sent me this picture, saying, "this is our path together. for a time, we may not be able to see our way, but remember, my love, the life-giving sun lies beyond the clouds".

Today, it feels especially cloudy. But I am not afraid to hope. I am not afraid to demand the Angelic realms light his path home. I am not afraid to ask you to say a little prayer on his behalf.

One moment at a time. One prayer at a time. One step closer to the sun.

Precious

What do you hold precious? Is it the laughter from your 4 year old? Is it the warmth of your partner under the sheets? Is it the smiling bark or the purr or the flutter of wings when you walk through the door? I certainly hope it is not your boat. Or your sizable bank account. Or your professional title. Or your Manolo Blahniks. Please tell me it isn't your over-sized, flat screen TV. Because if it is, you've missed the point. Of life.

In a world economy tilting on its axis, in times of illness and uncertainty, shiny, distracting things lose their luster. What we may have defined as precious a few months ago is gathering a film of tarnish. Things are revealing themselves for what they are... just things. The category labeled "precious" by our minds shrinks. The category of the same name found in our hearts expands.

Right now, in the only "now" there is or ever was, my list of what I hold precious is simple, but not short. Mostly, it includes aspects of the living and breathing. Like the sound of his voice. Like the tears of my Mom over the phone. Like the sweet and supportive gestures of my friends Lynn and Don and Sue and Janet. Like the happy sack of cat slung over my shoulder while typing. Like chocolate, like tea, like hot mushroom soup.

What is precious? The little details of relationships. Snippets of time where love is given and received. Full mind-body immersion in activities that speak to our soul. Every aspect of nature. Fresh water. Clean air. Forgiveness. And faith.

The Power Of Words

Niagara River. Canada on the left, U.S.A. on the right

Culinary Shop, Queen St., Niagara on the Lake

My Beloved Neighbor, Canada (I can see you from my house!)

Irish Tea Room on Queen St.

The Lovely Gillian

Dear Gillian,

Yes. It is all about the power of words. I agree they shape our world. They manifest or they take away. As we speak, as we write, as we declare, so shall our world be. Words offer opportunity and create pathways to our greater good. Had I never had the courage to begin writing in a public forum, I would never have met you. Had I never used words to express who I am, my world would be less sweet today. But I began writing and I continue writing and I wrote a path to you.

Today, over lunch and shopping in Niagara on the Lake, Ontario, I discovered you are a kindred soul. Not only do you write a blog I adore, you are mad for taking pictures, and are passionate about tea. As if that weren't enough to make me swoon, you love rocks and crystals and are wise beyond your years. Thank you for the reminder that choosing a direction, picturing the outcome and surrendering the request to the Universe is a sure-fire way to make dreams come true. Thank you for being so steadfast in your knowing that to stay in the moment, to focus on NOW, is the key to calm and peace within. You are beautiful inside and out.

On my return trip, while crossing the bridge back to the U.S., Elton John sang one of my favorite songs: Mona Lisas and Madhatters. I sang aloud the line, "I thank the Lord there are people out there like you". I am grateful. Thank you for a beautiful day. Thank you for being so open. Thank you for showing me if I am true to myself, if I use the power of my words well, good things and good circumstances and good people come along. What a nice life, aye?

Generous People

The most generous people I know have the least to give. They give a much higher percentage of their total income and Beingness than many of those who are flush. The most generous people I know are less afraid of doing without, even when they must, than many of those who will ever have to choose to deny themselves anything. The most generous people I know recognize genuine need and give without strings or concerns. They give because it's the compassionate thing to do. They give because in giving, they are themselves the ultimate recipient of good.

The most generous people I know are on alert for opportunities to share what they have. They are the ones who see we are not islands set apart from each other, but rather blooms in a vast, common field. They see that to keep one bloom from fading under the weight of inevitable storms and drought, is to keep themselves rooted in the grace and glory of God. The field is more beautiful and rich when we support each other in maintaining our individual blooms. The field is more rich when we share.

We Are Sacred

We are each of us sacred. If we know we carry the sacred with us, the sacred appears everywhere we go and in everyone we meet.

For sale in my etsy shop: http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=17046281&ref=em

Double 4

There was a time I detested my birthday. There was a time, on the cusp of 35, I was deeply depressed. I used to hold my birthday as a barometer of where I had not gone, what I had not achieved, and how off base my life was from that of societal norms. It was all I could do to hold my head above water while waiting for November 5th to pass. It's November 5th, 2008. I detest my birthday no longer.

Like my reblooming orchid, which once had 2 spectacular stems of flowers, and neat, compact roots, I find myself leaning off to the side. I have less blooms than I once did. I have wayward roots bent on seeing how far I can stretch beyond my formerly compact world. I have more leaves to take in more light. I am growing in a less structured way. I am doing my own thing. I am more interesting than I was.

So today, on my 44th birthday, a big rat's ass to societal norms. I am not irrelevant. I am not past my prime. I have work to do in this world: service to others, healing, creating beauty, offering compassion. I have finally learned to appreciate the beat of that different drummer I have heard my whole life. I choose to torment myself no longer.

Instead, I will eat cake. I will embrace the audacity of hope. I will ask God for the grace to do and say and not say what is in Its highest plan for me and those I cherish. I will express gratitude for the amazing people who bless my life. I will keep it simple. I will choose love.

p.s. And how's this for an lovely Universal gift? ~as I turned 44, I watched the gracious and dignified 44th President-Elect bring me to tears with his acceptance speech.

We Can and We Did

I live in a little red town in a big blue state. I bought 3 newspapers this morning at the tiny convenience store. I interrupted an argument with the local grey-haired population at the check out counter. They said indignantly, "How can he be President?? He's not even an American citizen? He was born in Kenya!" I said, "His father was born in Kenya. He was born in Hawaii." No, no, they kept repeating, the paper says he was born in Kenya! He can't be President! I repeated firmly, his father was born in Kenya. His father was born in Kenya. I wished them all a good day and smiled to myself on the way out the door. Walking past the new sign in the window of my neighbor ~ Forgive us O Lord for our nation~ I clutched those 3 papers to my heart.

Thank you, Mr. Obama, for restoring HOPE and dignity to my country.

Thank you to all the inclusionary-minded citizens of these United States for casting your ballots in favor of progress and change. A special thank you to Florida, Ohio, Pennsylvania, Indiana and Colorado.

Now, let us dare to raise this man up with the power of our positive thoughts. Let us allow him, through our positive thoughts, to be a great channel for our collective good.

God Bless America. And more importantly, God bless the world.

Sweet Spots

I'm experiencing yet another pause. My dreams are still hovering, but action is not the calling of the day. Awareness is. Gratitude is. Inspiration is. I look around me in this state of suspended animation and I see the miraculous in the ordinary. The Universe is highlighting the sweet spots of life, those easily dismissed what-more-could-you-ask-for happenings. It is my awareness

of these sweet spots that will keep me real and grounded as my life unfolds in new directions.

Inspiration and sweetness is my friend, Bahar. The Iranian born woman who came to America, by way of India, to escape the crushing oppression in her native land. Separated from her father for 12 years~ because of his being jailed for not being Muslim, his subsequent exodus to Germany with hopes and effort to establish his family in that country, hopes dashed, his family exiled to India and finally welcomed into America~ and one month after the news came of his approval to come to America to end the 12 years of separation, he died. Despite all that, despite a difficult life, Bahar glows from within. Tomorrow, she will marry the man of her dreams. Today, I made her wedding bouquet. It was a privilege to add my energy to an element of her great happiness.

Sweet spots, I have become aware, can be pleasingly salty. Especially when gathered with friends for a long overdue feast. Especially when host, David, regales the hungry revelers with gourmet pizzas. Cooked to perfection in his pizza oven, because naturally, all gourmet bread makers have a pizza oven in their garage. Throughout the evening, I paused to watch my friends drink and feast and laugh, and my heart swelled. It was a privilege to partake of such happiness.

I'm grateful for this pause in forward movement. I'm grateful for this chance to look around. Little miracles are coming into sharp focus. The core essence of life is revealing itself quietly. Happiness is everywhere. Inspiration is everywhere. The sweet spots keep coming and coming.